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Endtime accountablility.

11/28/2012

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This is my personal sacrifice to all 2012 morons, the people who believe that the lizard people are coming to rape us or that the world will spontaneously combust or whatever the hell it is you say will end the world this December 21st. I’ve been listening to you doomsdayers for years now; I listened to you in 2000 when you knew the world would end… I listened to you back out as the end time approached claiming that 2000 would merely bring the y2k computer virus… I listened to you nine years later in 2009 when some of you claimed that 2009  was really 2000 and the world would end that year (again when the time came you backed down). I’m listening to you now spewing about Dec 21st 2012, and of course as Dec 21st fast approaches the backing down process has begun (All of a sudden the end of the world has become a time of great transition or whatever).

I realise that the problem with you doomsdayers is a chronic lack of commitment. You want to feel that you have knowledge that the rest of us regular people don’t have but you don’t want to make the  necessary sacrifice of acting with conviction on that knowledge. This is my earnest attempt to help you fix that; at the end of this article is a BANK ACCOUNT number, because it is written “It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God”. All you have to do to show you commitment to your belief in the end of the world is transfer all your funds to this account, this will go a long way to convincing the doubters that you are not just full of shit. Please don’t concern yourselves with the difficulty you could (potentially) create for me… I don’t believe for a second that anything untoward will happen on Dec 21st (And even if it does I’ll be staying here on earth were I won’t have to listen to your irritating gloating).

Please note that, if (by some alarming chance) the sun does indeed rise on Dec 22nd as normal, you will not be getting back your funds as it is also written “A fool and his money…”

Please note also (Doomsdayers only) you are to transfer ALL your funds… ALL!

(To the rest of you with actual brains please be aware The $2 Philosopher is seeking to raise start-up capital to the tune of BDS $50, 000, to cover production, advertising and administrative costs. The $2 Philosopher(The business) is a comedy venture seeking to raise the profile of Caribbean comedy any contributions to the cause will be greatly appreciated. )

Nala (The $2 Philosopher)

REPUBLIC BANK (BARBADOS) LIMITED      Account Number 011350101001

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     The $2 Philosopher!

    The $2 Philosopher is a devout cynic and practicing curmudgeon! He believes whole-heartedly in change, not as a result of social will but rather as an inevitable consequence of the passage of time. 

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