I realise that the problem with you doomsdayers is a chronic lack of commitment. You want to feel that you have knowledge that the rest of us regular people don’t have but you don’t want to make the necessary sacrifice of acting with conviction on that knowledge. This is my earnest attempt to help you fix that; at the end of this article is a BANK ACCOUNT number, because it is written “It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God”. All you have to do to show you commitment to your belief in the end of the world is transfer all your funds to this account, this will go a long way to convincing the doubters that you are not just full of shit. Please don’t concern yourselves with the difficulty you could (potentially) create for me… I don’t believe for a second that anything untoward will happen on Dec 21st (And even if it does I’ll be staying here on earth were I won’t have to listen to your irritating gloating).
Please note that, if (by some alarming chance) the sun does indeed rise on Dec 22nd as normal, you will not be getting back your funds as it is also written “A fool and his money…”
Please note also (Doomsdayers only) you are to transfer ALL your funds… ALL!
(To the rest of you with actual brains please be aware The $2 Philosopher is seeking to raise start-up capital to the tune of BDS $50, 000, to cover production, advertising and administrative costs. The $2 Philosopher(The business) is a comedy venture seeking to raise the profile of Caribbean comedy any contributions to the cause will be greatly appreciated. )
Nala (The $2 Philosopher)
REPUBLIC BANK (BARBADOS) LIMITED Account Number 011350101001